Dear Katie
by LadyKatherine29
Summary: Does some jerk want your girl? Do Rotwillers hunt you? Does your spandex threaten you? Does your ex stalk you? Do bad bookers make you see red? In which Katie gives out advice to ROH 1PW and other wrestlers. reposted and chapter two is up!
1. Canadains, what's not to love

**I own nothing! I make no money off of this and it's all purely made up crazy lies by me. Lies! I swear none of this is true! This is just to make other people laugh. All copyright belongs to those who own them. All the wrestlers own them selves. So please ladies and gentlemen don't sue. This is a one shoot that ties into Of Friends, Enemies and Wrestling Rings; also lose ties to MissTraci's fic Ultimate Betray. **

Dear Katie

Dear Katie

I'm a well-put together, very talented wrestler. I've got it all. But, I can't seem to get a break. Nothing I do goes my way! It's that Eric Young's entire fault! He beat me in a turkey suit on thanksgiving! The fans love him for it! Why?! I'm much better looking, talented and my hair is better too! I've even got the woman my ex-stable mate's been panting after for years working for me! I know it can't be my fault I keep losing to that paranoid skit! It must be her fault!

Sincerely Robert Roode.

Dear Bobby.

Your problems seem to stem form bad booking. Well at least for you anyway. You need to get some blackmail or higher Shelly to find some dirt. Mind you this will cost you some cash. However in the long run it will do wonders for your career. Also, have you thought about taking bookings in England or somewhere else? This will help you to forget about having to job to a guy in a turkey suit.

In regards to this woman who your ex-stalemate's been hot for. It is not her fault at all. Two don't blame her for crappy match makers. Three if your ex-pal's been after this woman for years. Then I'd start watching my back, you could end up having an accident. If this guys that hot for her, then well you do the math. One last thing have you given thought to a name change? You could change it too Dobby!

Katie

Dear Katie

I'm a young hot stud of a candain! My talent dazzles and amazes both americans and my fellow candains. Recently the heel stable I was in was forced to disband. Right now I've got no direction and I've been made to go face. While being a face is cool, (helps get more hook ups!) I don't seem to be in line for anything. Not even a feud with anyone I've got history with. This really bites and is bugging the hell out of me. I want to be seen for what I'm.

A kick ass wrestler! I didn't even get considered for paring with a woman I've had it bad for years! Well at least on camera anyway...I don't if a relationship would be a good idea. I mean she is a co-working, and look at what happened to poor Matt Hardy. But she's the only woman I know who makes my heart feel whole. Is this love? Please help!

Canadian Destroyer.

Dear Canadian Destroyer.

Being young, hot and talented is all good. But it seems as if your suffering from what is known as getting shoved to the mid or lower card. This happens when shortsighted tools get jobs as bookers or writers. My best advice is to take matters into your own hands. Crash the end of a match in which the on air love of your life is out. Declare your un-wavering love and desire for her, then also declare you know the baby is yours. Or you could woman-napp her.

This will force management to do something. They will have to come up with something to explain it. Be warned this could get you into trouble with them. Still sometimes you have to take a stand. Also if she makes you feel such powerful emotions.

Then it is love. Take things slow and court her right. However bewared mixing business with personal can be risky. I've been married twice to guys I worked with and each time it ended badly. It also got me a stalker in the way of Mark Briscoe. Who to this day keeps popping up out of nowhere trying to seduce me. As so here's a hint,** stalking not a turn on. **

Katie

Dear Katie

I'm a still hot, but not so young buck of a candain. I've still got talent and make things look as good as ever. I even have fan women who think I'm dead sexy. I admit it's been a while since I was in front of a crowd to wrestle. I've mostly been an on air manager. I'm short of upper management, but have to be careful of certain people's toes. How can I get back on air to show off my newly buffed up sexy body? I also admit it's short of a rush to be in front of a live crowd.

While I understand that the younger guys should get airtime. I feel like I've got a right to show off my happy and sexy self. Even if I'm so busy I make Bill Gates look like a slacker. I own a wrestling school, sports bar and still do upper management stuff! However I'm going through a divorce and it hurts like hell. I don't want to say good-bye. But my wife feels as if we have nothing left. Is there anyway I can get her to see; I will never love anyone else? I never meant to cheat with that hussy. I will never love anyone the way I love Maddy.

Scott

Dear Scott.

You my friend seem to be one busy man. Perhaps you should consider slowing down just a little? Still if being very active makes you happy then go for it. You seem like a man who knows what he wants. So if you want to get a little airtime, then find a way. If you have gotten yourself feeling and looking sexy and want to share it. Then come up with a way to get on camera. Perhaps to stop a beat down or to inflect pain on someone who you have history with on air?

Besides you're in a management position, a good place to garter blackmail. Which will surly bring down your foes and get you your airtime. As a two-time divorcee I know the pain and hurt that comes from a failed marriage. Trust me when I say the only thing that helps is time. However if you honestly still love this woman. The only thing you can do is tell her everything in your heart. But as in my own case of marital break up, sometimes love just ant enough.

Katie. ps. I know she still cares,

but I think she's going to need a lot of time. Hang in their Scott.

Dear Katie

I'm currently hiding in a secret location. I can't say too much, for I fear that the Rottweilers will find me! Those guys are criminals and are trying to cripple me. I need to find more people to help me. My group broke up a while ago and this leaves me high and dry. Please help me! I'm scarred enough of being fired, I don't want to be crippled too!

Eric Young.

Dear Eric

Place a call to Chris Daniels. This should take care of all of your Rottweilers problems. Or anything else that comes up. Just keep your eyes and hands well away form Allison. Even if he doesn't know it yet, Allison is the woman he wants to have children with. To have a long happy life, and do all shorts of married people stuff with. Daniels is if anything good at getting rid of people's problems. The man has a talent for getting rid of his enemies. Just make sure you don't become a problem for him when it comes to Allison.

Katie

Dear Katie.

Why can't I get any respect?! People boo me as if I was some no talent twit. Things are going down hill fast with no signs of stopping. While I'm used to being booed before, at my old job. I thought that things would be different this time around.

Why have my peeps forsaken me?! I use to get cheered as a god! Now people think I'm a $# and a #$ with bad breath. How is that they no longer luw me?! Please help! it's not like I'm hanging with he who can't keep his pants on! I'm a wrestling god damn it! People should pay attention to ME and love ME!

CC

Dear CC,

You know next time you should put more than CC! For a moment I thought you were someone else who also goes by CC. Which left me very confused and more than a little concerned. For I know that CC and he's a kick ass cool guy. **Unlike you Mr. Whine. **As for being booed, most heels get booed. Unless your Chris Daniels, in which case most people just bow down and kiss your feet. Because well**...he is Christopher Daniels that's why. **Try turning back face if you are that upset by it.

Katie.


	2. Daddy! Ex's and woman stealers

Dear Katie

I'm a talented world traveled wrestler. I've been to England, Japan, Canada, Aussieland, you name the place. I've more than likely been in a wrestling ring there. Now I've done a few things that well...I'm not all that proud of. Nothing that's you know evil. Like going after under aged girls or driving drunk. But a while ago, I got talked into going out with a couple of guys.

Who I know but they like to try and lead me a stray. Anyway they tricked me into drinking a few white russians. **They tainted milk! How horrible is that?! **Anyway I didn't know and well they got me stinking drunk.

I mean so drunk I'd have made out with a chair if they told me too. I said a few things and did a few things I don't want anyone else to know about in that bar. I don't think Skipper would hang me out to dry. However... **Chris keeps teasing me! ****In public no less and while he's at it. He pulls me in for hugs and pats me on the head like a child! I need help!**

AJ.

Dear AJ,

Damn! Punk and Colt were right hanging out with Daniels and Skipper is not a good move. AJ, since you already broke rule one. Of the code of the Second City Saints. That's Hanging out with Daniels and Skipper. The next is do not let them get you a drink without being right there. You are going to have to try and suck it up.

(the third rule is drinking alcohol is not an option, when in the company of Punk.) Now I realize that living down drunken mistakes isn't easy. Hell I've got a major one I'm just trying to keep hidden form my family.

AJ you're going to have to find a way to get Daniels to lay off his constant teasing of you. Other wise the world will get wise. Have you thought about just freaking him out? You know smile big and then hug him, while declaring that you luw him? That should freak him out! Unless Chris has always wanted to secretly be your father.

Or if that's not your cup of tea. (as many of my trainers would say.) **Then fight fire with fire. Lay into Chris about his deep hidden love of Allison or Ronnie. That should get him to back off. That and maybe finally get him a girl friend to pestor. **

Katie

Dear Katie

I'm a 14 plus vet of the wrestling ring. I've been all over the place and done it all at least twice. But right now I'm stuck in a feud with a group of murderous thugs! I hate the fucking lot of them! However dispite that I'm really scarred for Allison. They have targeted her and it scares the piss out of me! I saw the tape from when they jumped me and the rest of my group.

I don't know what I'd do if those bastards got their sick hands of her. They mean to cripple my Allie. It's sick! That tool Corino is her brother! And that low rent bastard Ki is her ex! I need to keep her from harms way. I don't want her to leave; and I don't think she would even if I told her too. But I love her! How can I keep her from getting hurt?

Chris Daniels.

Dear Chris.

Allison is headstrong and doesn't listen unless she wants to. You're not going to get her to abandon you at this point. I understand your fears. The Rottweilers are criminals who should be in federal prison. Not in a wrestling ring, threatening you, Punk, Colt, Allison or even my ex-husband. Get reinforcements. Call every guy you know.

Then jump those bastards in the parking lot and send them to the hospital! That should send the right message. If that fails, then let me know I've got several people who owe me. **I'll make certain that Ki, Corino, and the rest of them are never seen from again. **

Katie

Dear Katie

I've got evil intensions for one of my co-workers. The scum sucking asshole wrecked my life! Daniels stuck his damn noise into something that wasn't his concern. End results I'm now divorced and my ex-wife hates me. That's not even the worst part, that asshole goes and gets his hooks into my sister! Now I'm working with **Homicide to take him down. Homicide! I fucking hate Homicide! **Ki is close to him so I'm stuck working with him. I want my sister away form that bastard! How can I make Allie realize he's just using her?

Steve Corino

Dear Steve.

You have no business telling Allie anything. She's got every right to do what she wants. If she wants to dump Ki, then I say go for it! I never liked that shifty bastard anyway! He always had that stalker look to him.

As for Ronnie and Chris telling her the truth. That's your problem! You're the one who couldn't keep his pants on! Maybe if you had then Ronnie wouldn't have left you! Then again maybe you are jealous over something? hum? Perhaps **Ronnie called out someone else's name during sex? **

Katie

Dear Katie.

I'm a hot young british high flyer. I do stuff that makes crowds fly their monkey every night. But I can't seem to get away form this one bloke. It's as if we are joined at the hip. I mean we have beaten the crap out one another. Teamed together, and done so much else together that people have been telling me. That it's too bad gay marriage isn't legal in Britain! I mean come on now mates! I'm not a nancy boy, bed wetter who likes other men. I'm not a poof! I love the ladies not the boys! How can I change this idea that I'm batting for the other team? Help!

Wonder kid.

Dear Johnny

Johnny some people are just mental. You know that, I know it and you always say it about Jody anyway. As you have told me in the past. People like to talk and throw trash. Just blow it off, and go out for a night of drinking and getting laid. Just make sure that the press sees you. **Also be sure to wear protection this time. I don't need you calling me at two am. Crying about how you got Ringer with child. **

Your faithful student.

Dear Katie.

Help! I'm hopelessly devoted to my woman. She's the sun, the air and all that wonderful goodness. But she's gone off with a scumbag! This guy bad news, he's not worthy of her brilliance! She's the greatest woman to ever grace my life, **I can't stand the idea of him being near her**. She's so pure and wonderful, a very loving and talented person.

I need her back! But Allison wouldn't have anything to do with me. She has told me many hateful things and it's killing me inside. To think of that little bitch Daniels being in her bed. **I hate Daniels! He's honor less and I think he's trying to get my Allison pregnant! I need a plan, please help!**

Low Ki.

Dear Low Ki.

Give it up Ki, Allie left you for a reason. You know perfectly well all of them. So please stop calling her, e-mailing her and stalking her. **Other wise you and I are going to have a short talk in a dark alley**. Also your wrong about Daniels being honor less. I've seen him follow the code of honor. **Unlike you Mr. fight in the parking lot! You wrecked my car!** As for Allie getting pregnant, I don't think she wants kids right now. **She's too busy beating up Tina and that slut Melissa. To even think of getting pregant. **

Katie

Dear love of my life.

Please honey I never meant to hurt you! Please all I want to do is make things right. I swear I never touched those two whores! It was date rape drugs! I know I can't prove it, but baby please let me take you out to dinner so we can talk? Just one night, and if after that you still don't believe me...I'll back off.

American Dragon.

Bryan Danielson.

Dear Bryan.

...I'm not unreasonable Bryan. But I've been a messed up wreck for a long time over our past history. I hear it form all sides when it comes to you. Everyone has something different to say on the matter. And most of it's not in your favor. I just recently got a second divorce, and even if this marriage ended better than the first one. I don't know if I can handle any more when it comes to marriage. My Saturday this week is free. Come over at 2pm and we will talk. Bewared Chris still wants to kill you, so does Colt and I don't even want to know what Punk thinks.

Katie.

Dear Katie

I hear through the grape vine that Dragon's been spewing some crap about date rape drugs. Honey I hope your not falling for his line of shit. That man is a stalker. You need to get a restraining order out on him. He's evil and he's only out to wreck your life, because he lives for controlling you! Please tell me your not buying any of his lies. You're too important to me, to watch that bastard destroy you again. **I will not stand by and watch him make you cry for a second time. **

your loving Cousin C.S.

Dear CC.

I understand your worries when it comes to Bryan. I know you never liked him, and still hate his guts. But Chris I backed off when you asked me too. In regards to that twit Petey and the hussy known as Traci. I did not get involved when she played you for a fool. Nor did I jump the twit from behind with a lead pipe. The night when he hit you with brass knuckles. So please just let me handle it. I promise to use extreme caution with Dragon. I won't just buy the story because I want to buy it.

your loving cousin.

Dear Katie.

Babe I'm sorry things didn't work out for you with Darren. I know it hurts, but at least he helped you heal. I know your still rightfully mad at me and Punker for hanging out with the ex-hubby. That was just business I swear! Daniels was the one who brought Dragon in, I was just along for the ride. **Please forgive me? If you do I'll have you on the show!**

Good Times Great Memories

Dear Colt.

Colt, I luw you too much to stay mad for long. I get that your only hanging with the ex because he's got more talent than the whole wwe roaster. Let's face it he's first choice for anyone forming a super group. He's got talent, and is a damn good man to have watching your back. Call me Friday night and we will go out and paint the town silver and black!

Luw your buddy

Dear Katie.

Hey baby! I'm back and ready to make that rat Dragon man up! So sweet girl, why have not returned my calls? Come on baby, I'll make him tap faster than Jimmy Rave in a dragon sleeper! So come on honey, why do you always run from your love muffin? I know your just playing hard to get, but babe you have taken it to the extreme. So do us both a favor and break out your cell and dial up Mark Briscoe for the time of your life!

Mark Briscoe your future hubby.

Dear Stalker.

**Look Mark, I've told you before. I'm not playing hard to get. I want you to get! As in get out of my life! Quit trying to use your strange abilities. To jump out of nowhere to try and woman-napp me. Your stalking is getting out of control and if you don't stop. I'm going to have to sic, ever man I know on you. **

** Unhappy victim**.

Dear Katie.

I'm the most moneymaking man in all of Switzerland! I've got the coolest gimmick since Chris Daniels fallen angel thing! Yet for whatever reason I can't seem to get a contract with up north or down south. What is it about them picking up no talent tools over me and Hero?!

I mean Hey! I've got more talent in my hair then they have in their whole body. While I can find work anywhere I would really like some big money. Who the hell do Hero and me have to beat up to get a contract? Also heard your single again girl! Way to ditch the brit, how about you and I get reacquainted? hum?

CC.

Dear CC.

Claudio good to hear from you! Been wondering when you and Hero would be back state side. Contracts with up north or down south are hard to come by. Reason being ever since the great buy out, there is no longer anyone with massive stupid money to throw. It's sad but true babe. Unless Bill Gates gets into wrestling. I don't for see how there will be another huge massive fed in the near future anyway.

ROH is still standing tall and so are several other indys. Still if you really want one, then your going to have to come up with some blackmail. Cause Jimmy is now in down south, and we both know he hates you and Hero. Camera phones and small vid cameras are now your best buddy. As for reacquaintedness thought I told you to keep that quite! I've got several insane family members, friends, and ex's. I don't need anymore heat with them. So please keep quite!

Katie.

Dear Katie.

My ex-husband is insane! He's hooked up with Homicide to go after Daniels. Because Chris finally figured out that Allison loves him. At least that's what he's claiming it's about. To be honest I think Steve thinks that by wasting Chris. He will somehow get me back. Steve never was very bright when it came to me or Chris.

I've got even money that says he still thinks I was cheating with Chris. Or at the least thinking of jumping Daniels hot body. Well he was the one who was cheating. Ha! At least I got him for a ton of alimony. Still he's really creeping me out...and to be honest. It's scaring the hell out of me. I don't want to work in a place were Steve's ego is allowed to rule. That and I think I might be in like with American Dragon...please help!

Ronnie Stevens.

Dear Ronnie.

Ronnie, I know far too much about insane ex's. First thing to do is get a restraining order. Steve is clearly both violent and insane; so it shouldn't be hard to get a judge to give you one. Next if you don't already have some, it's time to invest in some hand based weapons. Brass knocks with spikes or blades work great. Also buy some metal toed boots.

Then do a little custom work on them say place a retractable blade in the front. Next be honest with your self, do you really want Bryan?...** if so then you might want to head to your local ER for a head trauma check. Bryan is a heart breaker and a leaver from the word go. My advice is to try for Mark Briscoe or Claudio. **

** Katie. **

Dear Katie.

I'm starting to lose faith in humanity. I'm stuck right now back in a messed up war with the Rottweilers. I wouldn't have signed Colt and me on for this. Had I know Corino had finally lost his freaking mind! I mean come on Steve and I go way back. Yet even I didn't for see what kind of sick intensions he would have! Allison is his sister, his own flesh and freaking blood! He's supposed to protect her, as is the duty of all older brothers!

** What the hell is wrong with him?! He's with Homicide! Homicide of all fucking people! Steve hates Homicide! I know your mad about Dragon...all I can say is. That me and Colt didn't know about him. Straight Edge's honor, I had no idea Dragon was being brought in. If I had I would have mentioned something to you. Please don't be mad. **

CM Punk.

Dear Punk.

Yeah Steve seems to have gone and flipped out. I think it's his idea of a mid-life thing or something. As for the Rottweilers, we both know there all insane. Homicide must have mastered the sith mind whammy. Cause that's about the only way him and Steve could be in the same room. Maybe we should do an intervention for Steve?

Could be about the only way to make him sane again. Then again jumping him and beating the crap out of him would work too! As for being mad, Punker. How could I be mad at you? Luw both you and Colt too much to hold a major grudge. Come over Friday with Colt and we will party!

Katie.

Dear Katie.

Hello darling, it's me your ever-loving secret lover! So how's life been treating you? Not seen you since that night in Duncastor. Tell me why have you not been back to England? It's been too long since I saw you kick ass in the ring. Come on now love, I know that bastard Burridge and Danielson lead you on a marry disaster around of bad breaks. But love you need to stretch your wings again. Besides Donbroseky has become a horrorable mess to work with! Come back and do some announcer work with me! It will save this twisted genus's sanity.

Twisted Genus

Dear Twisted Genus.

Dean how many freaking times do I have to say this?! Do you not remember a the faze a gentleman never tells? Been working for ROH and getting into the advice racket. So far life's been ok, except I had to threaten that Crater woman. She is such a prick. Anyway love I might be able to be back for next months show. I'll get back to you asp! See you in Duncastor babe! Also please Dean don't spread more rumors about me being your love muffin. Love yeah but your teasing is getting on my neveres.

Katie.

Dear Katie.

Dude! What's up dog? I heard about you from a pal. He said you have great advice so I thought what the hell. My problem is that my boys have all gone nuts! Alex has become a wacko. Roddy has turned into a crazy woman beater and Jade has gone a long for the ride. I mean come on!

What the hell was his problem with Maddy being married to Scott anyway? I mean she's cool, and I'm still down with her. Not like she's a back staber, she just wanted some time with her man. Besides if Alex and Roddy did to me what they did to her. I'd have paid off Storm, Fliech and Pac to take them out!

Worst part is that Austin has turned into a complete loony. The man has it bad for a married woman. Who isn't into him, she's into her hubby. Which being married myself, is the right thing. I mean bad enough I leave my own honey alone so much. Man it's like he can't respect the married man! Please help!

Jack Evens

Dear Jack.

Dude! It's great to finally hear from one of my heroes! You are one of the reasons I leap off ladders! It's a great honor to hear from such a legend of leaps! ok...done marking swear! K, dude first off it's time to get dome new pals. Shelley is mental and going no where in a stupid angle. Next off Roddy has become el wacko.

Best bet is to pay a couple of guys off...for shall we say a removal of your problem. Next off If Aires can't pay respect to the married man. Then it's time to ditch him dog. It's the same old story, guy meets hot married woman.

Who's not into him, guy goes mental trying to break up marriage to get into woman's pants. It's time to place a call to your other dogs. Say call up Teddy Heart and re-form your tag team. You two could easily knock off the current tag champs of any fed. But if you want to stay in TNA dude, it's time to burry the hatchet into Roddy at the least.

Katie.


	3. Daddy Chris! Hobbits, and get the girl

Dear Bi&

You vile evil bitch! How dare you claim all of those evil and untrue things about me! I love Allison! She is the air I fucking breath, she's the reason I get up in the morning! How dare you say that she's happy with that no talent. Low class, honorless piece of gutter trash! Daniels is nothing but trouble and will ruin her life! Daniels is out to ruin all women's lives! Gods forbid if he somehow gets Allie **pregnant! I couldn't stand it! That vile bastard having her carry his spawn! **

He's a vile poison that has worked it's way into everything! He's got his vile mind whammy on you too doesn't he?! All I want is my Allie back, yet everyone is against me!** Can't you fools see that Daniels is evil?! I'd like to **see **your short hobbit skanky ass try and take me out! **You vile bitch! Your no better than that #$ whore who's a $$! ** Daniels has you all in his clutches! He's the reason for all of this; fear not I shall put an end to him! **

Low Ki.

Dear,** Low Ki. **

**Listen up you ass whole. You never and I mean never gave a damn about Allison! Nor did you ever care about Maddy! No one talks that way about my two sisters. No one treats my family like worthless trash and lives to tell of it. **_**As for me taking you out? **_**Jackass, I've got more an enough talent to take you down. **

**I didn't spend months getting stretched or used for target practice for nothing. Also learned more than one way to fight dirty. Comes from having Nigel as a trainer. ( Jody and Johnny were also helpful on that. The things I learned from Doug should be considered illegal.) **

**Also Ki, you have proven me right, with your response to my advice. Your a childish baby, who's only concerned with the fact Daniels seem to be one up on him. In fact this all happened because your obsessed with Chris? What the hell is your problem? **

**Daniels refused to shake your hand and you go all ballistic? Hell even my ex hubby didn't go this nuts. You need professional help. I don't care if Daniels steals the world's national treasures and sells them on E-bay. **

He's still more of a man than you will ever be! He's also more honorable as well. Unlike you he's never had it out in the parking lot! Next off you know how much I had to tell my car insurance people the same freaking story?

About how some jackass wrecked my car in a parking lot brawl at work? Do you know how many people I had to threaten? As for the hobbit remark...Ki. I won't go making any long-term plans. **No one calls me a fucking hobbit and lives. Loc and Devito owe me, and Doug loves me like his own baby girl. **

**Katie. **

Dear Katie.

Dude! Thanks for the advice babe! I'm now back with my boy Teddy, and I got us all set for a shot at Americas most drunk. The fools don't even have a clue. Teddy and me will soon have gold around our waists and it's all thanks to you! Babe I had no idea you had that much swing in merry old England.

Man I can't wait to see Storm and Harris faces. Once they realize that they can't win Ladders, Balconies, and swimming pool match! Ha! Also thanks for the advice when it came to el nut case. Putting Roddy on the shelf really got D'Amore off my back.

Now he will say hi in the hall ways and stuff again. Now all I need is advice on how to get my boy Austin a hook up! He seems to be slowly getting that Maddy will never be into him. So I want to try and hook him with some sweet lady. That way he will not be lonely.

Jack Evens.

Dear Jack

Dude! So glade your back with Teddy! You two will clearly wipe the floor with AMdumb. I can hardly wait for that match, so glade I'm in with 1PW management. Dean really comes through for me. It was an easily sell anyway. You and Teddy are hot in the land of tea and biscuits.

Heheheh. Nice to know Scott's off your back too. Never saw a guy who could hold a grudge more. Well except for my ex-hubby. Don't get me wrong both guys are sweet and pretty cool. But dude you so don't want on their bad sides. ( Not that I've ever been there. Don't seem to get on many guys hate list. Well except for Ki and Corino.)

As for hooking up Austin. Dude don't worry about your boy. I hear that several nice ladys got it bad for him. I don't know all the names. But word is Daziee, Melissa, and a few other kick ass women think he's hot stuff. So have no fear your boy will be off the market sometime soon. I'll see you in Dun-castor!

Katie.

Dear Katie

I need help! I know I wrote to you before about those two guys? I told you about the ones who are out to lead me a stray? Well I tried out your advice and well it worked at first anyway. Chris was all big eyed and even spit his water all over! Skipper nearly fell over and died. It all went perfectly at least for a few days anyway.

Somewhere a long the line Daniels decided that he was going to actually listen to me! He went and tried to talk to Ronnie about something...which isn't a bad thing. ** But her crazy ex-husband heard Chris in the middle of what sound like would you bare my child? **

**Which lead to a huge brawl! I mean not a single thing not nailed down back stage lived! It was crazy! Anyway I got sucked into things by default. I guess it's because of all my history with Chris. But the worst part is that I think Chris really wants to be my daddy! **

Because he went postal when Homicide tried to get me into the cop killer. You don't want to know what Chris did to Homicide. It was messy...really messy...but this lead to a few things I didn't want out. Coming out in a strange fashion that is. Now anytime someone who he doesn't a prove of. Tries to talk to me or worse if a fine looking woman comes up to me. Chris gets all over protective crazy mad daddy on me!

He told Lacey and I quote... **"Get your vile std ridden unclean hands off my son! Your not fit to breath the same air as my baby boy!"** Lacey ran off faster than the road runner. I just stood their in shock as Chris; came over and told me I could do better than some hussy. I didn't know what to say or anything.

Lucky Cabana and Punk showed up wanting to talk to Chris. Which let me escape his parental grasp. I was lucky that time, no one else saw or heard anything. But I don't know how much longer my luck will hold. That and Chris somehow got my cell phone number. He's been calling me night and day, telling me that I'm his son and that I will listen! Help!

AJ.

Dear AJ.

Holy lady of the honored dead! Daniels really wants to be your father...AJ bro. Your going to have to figure out someway to get daddy Chris to back off and fast! That is if you don't want the rest of the locker room to start laughing. Try finding blackmail of some kind any kind. Just something that will make him back off. At least when it comes to your love life anyway.

Hum... does Allison know he was attempting to ask Ronnie out? If not threaten to sic Allison upon him. To be honest I though he was just in love with Allison... Well that's what his letter said anyway. Me thinks the gentleman has it bad for many a fair maid.

That or the whole Ronnie thing was about something else. Which lead to Corino going ape over nothing. Daniels doesn't strike me as the kind of man. Who would try to build a herm of bedroom slaves. So you might want to get in touch with Ronnie and see what was really going on. Best guess is that Ronnie will be your key to getting daddy Chris to back off.

However in full honest AJ, you could do a lot worse than Chris Daniels as a second daddy. I mean if he really cares about you, then you might want to think of keeping him. After all if nothing else you will always have someone watching over you. And if nothing else you can get a new ketch phrase. I mean how many guys will ever get to be able to yell Daddy Chris!

Katie.

Dear Katie.

I've got it so bad for a co-worker! It's driving me crazy just thinking about her. She's so perfect, kind and over all just a top shelf woman in everyway. So why in hell's name does she love that pig?! D'Amore is a vile evil rat bastard, who doesn't give a damn about her! He treated her like trash, had those pigs 3D put her through a fucking table!

Yet somehow he has the key to her heart! She went back to him even after all that crap! Why?! Why do women want the evil emo guys!! What they hell is wrong with them! I swear he's still got a grip on her, even if she's divorcing him right now! It's enough to make me sick and I can't stand it!

All I want is for her to be happy...but not with a creep like Scott! Why does everyone think I'm only in this for me?! Jack went and told me he's done with me personally if I don't stop. I don't know why Jack would say this, I mean he's my dog! Why can't every on see that I would never treat her like that? Please help!

Austin Aires.

Dear Austin

Austin, I know that you have several valid points. I also know that Maddy does in fact love Scott. I also know that Scott does in fact regret his treatment of Maddy. When she first signed with TNA, he actually called me one night drunker than hell. And told me that he hates himself for it, and he's shocked that Maddy didn't try to bring that into court for their divorce. He was a frightful sounding mess and let me just say I've never heard anyone sound so broken.

You entered her life at the wrong time Aires. I'm sorry to say that it's just not in the cards right now. Trust me when it comes to the cards I know. I know that you seem to think that Maddy needs a hero right now. And maybe she does need a hero, and I know that this seems like a golden opportunity. To gain the love of a woman you seem to have it bad for.

However Austin it seems to me as if you are desperately trying to save her. From what you feel is a evil and uncaring husband who's unworthy of her love. Which leads me to wonder if your trying to save yourself. Or redeem yourself, perhaps a somewhat similar situation happened in your past. And now you see a way to make it all right by saving Maddy.

Austin you need to let the past go and make amends with Jack. He's just been very concern about your self-disruptive behavior. Like it or not Aires; Scott is upper management, which means trying hooking up with Maddy.

Is a very bad move both personally and professionally. Seeing as how Scott could and would make your life a living hell. You don't want to confirm his fears. That you were nothing but a evil home wrecker, out to take his wife and ruin his personal life.

I hear that Melissa seems to think your sweet. **While I can't personally say she's a great woman...she could be a chance for you to be happy. Again while I have some history with that two face, little hussy with a flat .**...cough... I mean that talented and rather nice lady. You should give it a chance with her. Or some of the other ladys who I know think your the one. Daziee, and several other women I know would love to give it a shoot with you.

Katie.

Dear Katie.

**I'm desperately sorry about last Friday...but to be fair I'm still blaming Dragon for it all. He's not good for you honey and you know that. Honey that man is pure poison, you know that. It's like he's in your vains and you don't know how to break those chains. Honey that man... if I can call him a man. He's nothing but trouble for you and I don't want to see you cry again. Please consider going back out on the road with me and Colt. The Second City Saints fall raise again! **

CM Punk.

Dear Punk.

Punk, you and Colt have been close to me for a long time. I get that you have issues with my ex. I get that you don't want him around me. **However Punk, you jumped him at a restraint. **He was having dinner with Joe, CC and Hero. I don't recall him saying anything to me when we walked by.

Even if he did, Punk you jumped him at a restraint. ** We ended up in the middle of a public brawl. (which was really fucked up. Since you know I like Claudio. He's a pal. Not that hitting Nana wasn't cool. No idea why the Embassy was there too.) **

Mind you we didn't get busted for it...but Punk your going to have to tell me what set you off. What the hell did Bryan say to make you go nuts? Why do you and Colt want to grab me and head to Japan and England? What the hell is going on with everyone looking at me like they know something I don't?

As for the offer, I would love to get back into the swing of things. But as of right now I'm retired, at least until my head is back in the game. Some things just hurt too bad, and I can't take both the road and the heart break. Not at the same time anyway.

Katie.

Dear Katie.

Babe, look I know Punker and I kind of went a little crazy... but I blame Dragon for it! The man is a tool and well me and Punk kind of care too much sometimes. You know how it is, hate to see a pal getting burned or seeing the jack off who did the burning. And I get that you short of want answers to certain questions.

Still babe, I really think it would be good for you. To get out of the states for while. Being back in England would do wonders for you! Besides I know a lot of those boys in England think your pretty damn hot. It would be a great way to get back into the swing of things and score a date!

Colt Cabana.

Dear Colt.

Colt I understand that you and Punk have it in for Bryan. But like I told Punk, what the hell is going on?! You two seem to be obsessed with getting me out of the country? That and you jumped Bryan in a public place. Someone had better start talking. Cause I'm really wondering what the hell is up with you two. What is so freaking horrible about him now?

What has us having to out run the cops? Luw yeah Colt, but I want an explanation to what went on Friday night. Before I even think of heading back on the road with you two. Besides I have a gig in in Dun- Castor in about two weeks anyway.

Going to be doing color for a show with Dean Ayass. Is going to be a blast. Your going to be on the show too Colt or did you forget? Anyway give my other ex-husband a hello for me would you?

Katie

Dear Katie.

Babe! Thanks for the advice! I did what you said and now the world thinks I'm a stud! I got that gay monkey off my back for good! Only problem now is that I think Ulf Herman wants me balls hanging on his wall! It seems as if the seven foot tall hardcore German; has a thing for Nikky.

I didn't know this and well I kind of short of had a little bit of a tryst with her. I didn't flipping know I swear! Now he's trying to shot on me anytime he sees me! It's just not at work, he's trying to take me out anywhere he sees me. Things are starting to get out of hand. It's almost as bad as what Corino's been up too!

I don't want or need any heat with Herman! How can I get him to back off? I mean it's not as if I'm seeing Nikky now. It's not like we hooked up and she's my girl. But he's acting as if I violated his wife. I need help, how can I get him to realize. That me and Nikky were a one time thing that wasn't even a thing?

Wonder Kid.

Dear Johnny.

Bro, first off glade your no longer thought of as a nancy boy. Next Ulf has always had a thing for Nikky. If what your saying is true. Your thing that wasn't really a thing. Sounds more like some heavy make out or something. Then you need to let Nikky know Ulf has a major thing for her. She's been in the dark for years and Ulf's been too shy to say anything.

Take Nikky to a pub for fish and chips, and then tell her about Ulf. So long as you keep things on the up and up. You should be just fine. Also have a second party tell Ulf your not after his dream woman. That should straighten things up.

Faithful student.

Dear Katie.

I've never done this short of thing before...but oh to hell with my male pride! I've got it bad for a wonderful and brilliant lady by the name of Daziee Haze. Of all the things I've done in my life I can't help but wonder what I was thinking. When I thought not working with her at ROH was a good idea. I think I feared the idea of the fact I had it bad for her. I'm a fool! I'm but a fool who throw away what he had.

Now all I do is dream of her. Delirious tells me I should just grow some male tools and tell her. Then again he says chewing on streamers is a great way to pass the time. So you can see just how messed up my situation is. While I want nothing more than to take her in my arms. I fear that time has come and gone. I hear she's with someone not in the business. While it would be easy to say...get rid of my rival. I don't see myself as a home wrecker or a stalker. Please help!

Matt Sydal.

Dear Matt.

I had no clue she was dating some guy not in the biz. Look Matt if you really love her, then get off your ass and tell her. I know of several guys who are also hot for her. So you had better move fast. Most of them aren't the type one to beat around the bush and to be honest most of them are rather cute.

If you want to even have a chance, move fast. So try and get the truth behind if she's even dating this guy. She may very well still be single. But she won't stay that way for long. So go see her in person now and confess.

Katie.

Dear Katie.

I'm reallyveryvery# inlove withthis$!! woman! Sheisthesunthemoon.&! I reallywanttoaskherout. But #$&!&!&! and &&!&&#&#!#$#$#$$. EveryfuckingtimeI'mreallypissedIfuckinghateRAVE! HowcanIgether to realize I love her?

Delirious

Dear Delirious.

That is the saddest thing I've ever read. Honey I had no idea you were so wronged by that twit. Never fear my favorite masked man. I have a plan, which will take out that tool Jimmy. I never knew Jimmy was such a fucking jerk. Well two can play at that game. Meet me at Bongo's this Sunday at 4pm we will put an end to Jimmy.

Katie.

Dear Katie.

I've never done this short of thing before...but oh to hell with my male pride! I've got it bad for a wonderful and brilliant lady by the name of Daziee Haze. Of all the things I've done in my life I can't help but wonder what I was thinking. When I thought not working with her at ROH was a good idea. I think I feared the idea of the fact I had it bad for her. I'm a fool! I'm but a fool who throw away what he had.

Now all I do is dream of her. Delirious tells me I should just grow some male tools and tell her. Then again he says chewing on streamers is a great way to pass the time. So you can see just how messed up my situation is. While I want nothing more than to take her in my arms. I fear that time has come and gone. I hear she's with someone not in the business. While it would be easy to say...get rid of my rival. I don't see myself as a home wrecker or a stalker. Please help!

Matt Sydal.

Dear Matt.

I had no clue she was dating some guy not in the biz. Look Matt if you really love her, then get off your ass and tell her. I know of several guys who are also hot for her. So you had better move fast. Most of them aren't the type one to beat around the bush and to be honest most of them are rather cute.

If you want to even have a chance, move fast. So try and get the truth behind if she's even dating this guy. She may very well still be single. But she won't stay that way for long. So go see her in person now and confess.

Katie.


	4. Ladies only

Dear Katie.

I'm hopelessly devoted to the man of my dreams. Only problem is that I'm kind of shy. That and I work with him so it's got that whole dating your co-worker thing.

I just don't know if this is a good idea….. yeah know? I really have it bad for him...but he's still a co-worker. Jimmy says I'm just being a drama queen and to get off my tush and go tell him. I know Jimmy makes a valid point, but I need help! Also I've got a problem...well let's just say his daddy. Thinks I'm a cheap hussy with no redeeming value. I'm not a hussy! Nor do I have stds! How can I get him to back the hell off?

Lacey.

Dear Lacey.

Honey if you have it that bad for AJ. Then you should do as Jimmy says. Ask him out for dinner or lunch and let him know. I know dating a co-worker is not always a good idea. When it goes south it really goes south so I get that your feeling as if it's not a good idea.

But Lacey honey you seem to really want Styles in your life. Go for it. I think I know how you can get daddy to back off. Call up Allison and sic her on Daniels. If there is one thing he fears, it's Allison's wraith. Chin up honey, if anything can make Chris back down it's Allison.

Katie.

Dear Katie.

Hi, long time no see missy! How have you been? Heard that you seem to be finally getting back into the biz. About time, was wondering when you would. I know you are kind of mad about Dragon. Honey I didn't mean for it to be a slap in the face. Anyway my brother and ex have gone crazy and won't be back in five. Steve and Ki seem to think Chris has me in this thrall. As if I'm a mindless pleasure slave, used for his enjoyment.

Who needs to be saved from the big bad evil sexual predator. Ha. If anything Chris is going to be needing saving from me! Once I work up the never to tell him. heheheh. ok, I know too much info. Problem is that I think Chris is letting thing one and thing two's actions get to him.

I think he's going to try and make me leave him. For my own safety, which granted means he cares. But that man had better realize that I'm not going to stand by. And let my moron brother and ex beat the shit out of him. Chris has always been there for me. I'm not about to let him go it alone. How can I make mr. macho realize this?

Allison.

Dear Allison.

Honey I've been about as good as I can be. I bare no grudge against you or anyone else when it comes to Dragon. Well I guess I could but I like you, Punk, Colt and Maddy way too much. Told you Ki was a wacko stalker. ** He always did act like fellow nutcase Mark Briscoe. **

Just never knew your bro was a dumbass too. Good to know that you will soon have your man in his place. heheh. I'm certain Daniels will very much enjoy it. Speaking of your devil with brown eyes, could you have a short talk to him. About how it's not cool to run Styles love life? Thanks.

As for him being freaked by dumb and dumber. Well he's got good reason, Steve and Ki are nuts. However I think things will work out as long as you use caution. Weapons are your new best friend, keep them on you while at work. I don't know about after, but you might want to think about it. I don't want you getting hurt and so help me if you do. I'm going to show the world why I make a very bad enemy. Take care honey.

Katie.

Dear Katie.

Hi...yeah it's been a while hasn't it? I heard from Allie that you were in the hospital to visit me. I want to thank you for doing that. I know you have been really out of it since Bryan. Also thanks for listening when it comes to my own soon to be ex-husband. I'm really grateful that you listen to my rants. I just wanted to say thank you for not trying to end me.

For that flirting with Chris...I don't know why I did. I guess it was that he made me feel like a desirable woman. I needed to feel so damn badly after that dvd...again wrong but I did anyway. Yet you aren't holding it against me or trying to kill me. I don't know how you do it...but I'm really grateful that you do.

Is there anything other than time that makes the pain go away? I know you have said getting trashed doesn't help...but it hurts. It hurts...I don't know why I still love Scott. But I want it too stop...hurts to much to love him. Getting trashed is the only way I know of to make it stop.

Maddy.

Dear Maddy.

Honey, I will always listen you to no matter what. As for my wacky cousin, he made you feel good. So how the hell can I get mad about that? He knows about your divorce and just wanted to help. Divorce hurts like a mother fucker, and no honey only time and distance really help. Getting trashed only works for a night and the hang over isn't worth it.

Trust me Madison, getting trashed isn't the answer. I know how much it hurts to love someone who's done you wrong. Honey I want you to listen to your heart. Only you know if it's worth it to stop and run back. I know that sounds lame...coming from me. She who's been divorced twice. But Honey I know you love him, and he loves you. So just listen to your heart before you tell him good-bye.

Katie

Dear Katie.

I have more man problems than anyone should. I guess I should start at the beginning...most of this could very well be my fault. You see I was dating this guy a while back. I thought he was the one. I was so hopelessly devoted to him that...looking back now I wonder what the hell I was on.

Sad thing is that drugs can't be blamed for it. Well I went and hurt some guys...yeah super bitch didn't have jack on me. Well bottom line is that I want to somehow make up for it. But I don't know if I can even get one of the guys I hurt to talk to me.

I really want to make amends but I fear he will just rightfully so spit in my face. As for the other guy well he's sweet and all...but he's got a stalker like history with me. I don't know if I should even try to say anything to him. Help! I don't know what to do.

Traci.

Dear Traci

Well...very shocked you wrote me. Then again I guess I should be adult about this...not like your that tart/flat chested rat...ok done. Well Traci it's good that you have a handle on your past behavior. I'm not perfect and well I get our situation. However in my own past history. I've found that sometimes it's just best to let it go.

Making amends with people you have hurt is a hard road to take. Most of them just don't buy it or want to hear it. Bottom line is that all you can do is try and help them out in the future. And hope that you have in someway let them realized that your not evil.

Trust me, I've got more than my share of mad ex's. Working example I use to date...well let's just call him...hum...well let's just say I dated. Some interesting guys, who my ex-husband knows. Both times along with two marriages it went south. And when I say south I mean south.

Now while I tired to make things right...it didn't work out very well. Best advice just leave them be. You seem to have a handle on your life anyway. I think what you need is a fresh start. I know for a fact that Punk still loves you. He was listening to Far Away again while looking at your picture. Call him up and see if things still feel right. I know you two ended on decent terms. So why not give it one more chance?

Katie.

Dear Katie.

Now before you burn this, just hear me out. One I swear I wasn't having relations with your ex-husband. All right now my problem is rather messy. I have this guy, who I really like. I've had it bad for him for years. But he's only got eyes for this chick that doesn't even like him.

How can I get him to realize that he's pinning over someone whom he never even had a chance with? This guy is ultra sweet, loving and all around great guy. But for whatever reason he's got a thing for getting his heart beat on. It's as if he's only interested in the emo women! What the hell is wrong with him? Can you please help...I really like this guy.

Melissa.

Dear M...

Well...it seems to be my day for getting letters from people I have history with. Just my freaking luck...alright I'm a professional...swear I'm. Alright Melissa...I'll make this short and well short.

This guy seems to have issues...and he sounds a lot like Aires. So my advice to you is grab hold of him and just blurt out everything. If anyone needs the direct route it's Aires. Just tell him how you feel...and please never write me again...

Katie.

Dear Katie.

I have a huge problem. I've got two guys after me. Now to most women this won't be such a big deal. They would just pick one and be done with it. Problem is that both are co-workers. Who unknown to me have been caring a torch for me for who knows how long. I don't want or need the fall out. That comes form having dated a co -worker. But they are really hot. I'm taking earth shattering, dry orgasm hot. Please help love! I have it bad for two brilliant men but have no idea what to do!

Nikkita.

Dear Nikkita.

Damn! Nikkita I think I know at least one of men you're talking about. And yes honey Ulf is that hot. I know all too well the problems of a fall out. Now while most people say no data the co-worker. I say go for it. Life is too freaking short to always play it safe.

Still if these two men are that into you. And that freaking hot, I say flip a coin and ask one of them out. If the one who wins the coin tosh turns out to be a throw away. Then give the other man a chance. Who knows maybe it could be love.

Katie.

Dear Katie

I've got it bad for the man I'm currently dating. Yet for what ever reason he's still hung up on his ex! She's nothing but a skanky ho! Who kicked him to the crub for one small mistake. I swear her and that blondie ring rat are nothing but trash! How can I make Ki realize that he should be looking at ME and not her.

Tina.

Dear $..

Tina if anyone's a fucking ring rat it's you! You misrable excuse for a breathing human being. Have more guts than brains...or your dumber than Ki looks. I'm leaning to the dumb part at present. I may not be currently working at the moment. However bitch, you just gave me very deep incentive to get back into the ring.

Let me make this clear to you and the slut your dating. No one trashes Allison or Madison while I breath. I'll see your skanky ass in two months in England. Word to the wise Tina...if you show up with Ki or his crew of pricks.

I will be forced to break out all the blackmail I have. I promise you this on the blood in my vains...you and the Rottwillers won't make it out of the UK in one piece. Also should you choice not to show up. Then **I will have to take matters into my own hands. **

**Katie. **

Dear Katie.

I'm currently stuck in a stupid angle, that is going no where fast. At first I thought it might be cool or at the least intresting. But now it's all going down hill fast. I'm supposed to be scarred of a drunk and a woman who's ass I could easly kick.

I don't know what the bookers or writers are on but it's really pissing me off! Why the hell can't they just book a kick ass match? It's not that hard, I mean come on Traci has talent damn it! Her and I could put on a damn good match! What the hell is everyone on?! Also I think I might be in love with a co-worker.

But I don't know how I can get close enough to even ask him! He seems to have gotten a crazy over protective daddy! Daniels now thinks he's Styles daddy! What the freaking hell?! Daniels put word out that anyone wanting to date his "son" had better be top shelf. To even be considered for a interview, for consideration for just the chance to talk to AJ. Please help!

Gail Kim

Dear Gail.

Gail your going to have to find some blackmail. And I mean down and dirty, this will wreck a ton of people's lives blackmail. It's about the only way to get things done anymore. Then again you seem to have a fairly good in with D'Amore. So maybe you should think of talking to him. Try bring it up in a polite and logic based manor. Getting defensive and hostle isn't a good way to go.

By being more deplamatic and prosenting a alternative storyline. That's been thought out and several planed kick ass matches with Traci. You will surly have a good chance to get things changed. If not go for the blackmail as I mentioned earlier. It may not be the nicest way to get things done. But it gets things done, and sometimes that's all that matters.

In regaurds to AJ, honey your not the only woman who's written to me on him. Styles has got a body that won't stop, with beautiful eyes and a grin that makes a woman melt. Only downside is that he somehow has managed to pick up Daniels as a second father.

Now while Daniels is certainly a very worthy father for anyone. He's highly over protective at the moment. Because of Low Ki, and his crew of pricks. Talk to Allison about how to get a intro. This should help things. If not try ketching AJ while he's at the airport. Bewarned Gail, Lacey also has it bad for Styles. So you may have to fight it out for AJ. Perhaps you should go for another man? I hear Mark Briscoe is still singel.

Katie.

Dear Katie.

I'm royally pissed off and I don't know what to do. I was fired recently over nothing. Thing is animal boy was getting in my face and all I did was defend myself. Yet I get the ax because "princess" doesn't like anyone Paul things is great. Bottomline I'm mad as hell and thinking of filling and unfair termination suit. What I want to know is if you think it's worth the money? Also I kind of have it bad for Matt Sydal...however my current situation is really crapy. Can you help a girl out?

Airel.

Dear Airel.

One I think your firing was compleat bullshit. So if you have the money go for a law suit. Or at the least find a lawyer and see what she or he thinks. If you would rather just forget them all. Go back to what makes you happy. You have massive talent and are fucking brilliant in the ring. I think you would be an easy fit anywhere. Two once you figure out what you want to do. I say give Matt a call or try and get booked on a card with him. After the card chat him up a little and see where things go.

Katie.


End file.
